Ummm which is the pants story?
"The Fox in the Forest," which takes place in the days before permanent press.
A great story; one of those, though, when I'm reading it, I always somehow want it to end differently!
You might be a Ray Bradbury fan:
- if you become obsessed with being the first on your block to actually possess a cupful of the sun.
- if your house is the only one on the block to escape a nuclear disaster and your appliances keep everything perfectly neat long after your death by radiation poisoning.
- if you notice your cow is growing a horn, your wife is getting sexier and more golden eyed, and your son recommends moving to those curious Martian ruins in the hills.
- if the sound of rain on your space helmet drives you mad.
- if you've been trying to kill your co-workers because you believe their cubicles contain "three more extra days of life."
- if you develop a sudden and irresistable urge to destroy every annoying electronic device on the planet. (extra fan points for actually getting jail time)
- if you think it's hilarious to convince the local midget he's getting SHORTER and SHORTER.
- if every three or four years, you pack your things and move on to another good hearted family, whom you hope won't realize you're not 12 years old anymore.
- if you won't go to Chicago, because you're convinced, that upon entering, it will eat you.
- if, upon every full moon, you have your bed put at the edge of the forest, in hopes of getting laid and kicking your lithium pills.
- if you can't afford to take your family to the Grand Canyon, so instead you sell your business to build a cheap facimile that briefly convinces them they're flying over it.
- if you know, just KNOW that this will be the day, the minute, the second you'll finally catch up with the ever illusive UPS man that seems to deliver everyone elses' packages on time.
- if your baby is trying to kill you.
- if your children are trying to lure you into a den of lions.
- if you have a man that resembles Rod Stieger living next door that is really into S and M, and is covered with tattoos. (Extra fan points if you experience hallucinatory dreams of the future every time you stare at said tattoos.
- if you think that your flatscreen t.v.s should exist on three walls, but that the coolest people have them on all four walls.
- if you're at any job anywhere that has more technology to it than you have know how, but, it's still no big deal because the machine does it for you.
- if you've read all the above, and get the references.
I just found this from when I posted it on this site in 2004, the last time I was here actually. lol.
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